Contributed by furor celtica:

Palestinians announced today that they have "the boulder"? Apparently it is a rock that is much larger than the ones they use on Israeli tanks that run over their houses and children.

Following the lead of North Korea, Palestine boasted publicly for the first time Thursday that it has large boulders and said it will stay away from peace talks, dramatically raising the stakes in the ongoing dispute. The Bush administration called on Palestine to give up its "large rock" aspirations so life can be better for its impoverished people.

Palestine's harshly worded pronouncement posed a grave challenge to President Bush, who started his second term with a vow to end Palestine's boulder program by using the road map to Disney World.

"We ... have manufactured large boulders for self-defense to cope with the Israeli's ever-more undisguised policy to isolate and stifle the Palestinian nation," the Palestinian Press Secretary said in a statement carried by Al Jezeer. The agency's report used the word "large rocks" in its English-language dispatch.

Previously, U.S. negotiators said Palestinian officials claimed in private talks that they had large rocks and might test one. The Palestinian U.N. envoy also said last year they had "chiseled" rock from its pool of 8,000 destroyed homes around the West Bank.

"The message is clear: give up these aspirations for larger rocks and you know life can be different," Secretary of State Rice said, adding that it was the same message Libya understood in renouncing its large rock throwing ambitions.

In other news, Easter Island has hinted to the possibility of upping the anty by not releasing the ever elusive Easter Bunny this year. Sources close to the Easter government have been quoted as saying "that this [holding the Easter Bunny] is a necessary step if we are to secure our borders from the hostile advances of freedom loving nations. We are appealing to christian children worldwide that if you want to see your chocolate cross's and bunnies this year you must tell your leaders to tone down any hostile intentions they might have towards our small island nation."